feelings

Sitting here trying to process all of the emotions i have been feeling lately. Mostly sadness, anxiety and fear. I think as people we try so hard no to feel anything. Maybe if I just sit with these emotions I will come to understand them better and then be able to deal with them more effectively. I began this love without fear thing with myself recently. Realizing I cant control anyone I figured that if I love freely without fear then get hurt I would just remove myself from the situation. If someone takes that and mistreats that then they lose the benefit of me. That's how I planned to move through out the rest of my life. So far the pain is really hard to get past...the uncertainty to. I guess I am just that much set in my ways.

I don't know

My whole thought process is fucked up. Trying to just live in the moment cause if I think even the slightest bit ahead...I fall apart

I so confused

My life is in turmoil right now. Not knowing if soon my heart will no longer be my own. I dint know what to do or how to feel. Im just here and im not sure if thats a good place to be.